How to spot a Bong?

1. He loves fish and is a big foodie. He compares standards of living with prices of “Eilish”. Also his existence is thrilled with “Biryani” and “Chicken chaap” and ofcourse the size of the Potato in it.

2. He strays from his way to work, looking high and low, from roof-tops to roof-tops for tracking down a “shalikh” if he saw one.

3. He is very interested in conversations of change, growth and has an insatiable thirst for political reform which is and never will be quenched. Yes only the conversation.

4. He has to bring Rabindranath into any argument he cuts across. He loves name dropping and the sole purpose of his life is to opine about ever thing, and they will be the one fisrt to say “I told you so!” or “Ami jantam!”.

5. They thoroughly enjoy football. So much, as to they cheer for the athletes of a country who imprisoned them for 200 years.

6. They are incredibly lovely as friends and would certainly go out of their way to embarrass you, or even discourage you in all and any social or professional endeavors.

7. All of them have a common address of 221 B, Baker street. Even if they are unfamiliar with Doyal’s work.

8. They had high school sweet-hearts who changed after college, because she started dating and became “ultra-modern”.

9. They love their mothers and will always be found wearing a monkey-cap and a muffler.

10. They want to go abroad but don’t want to leave the comfort of their city.

11. He must have “maccher jhal” every day! His favorite snack is Muri Tele-Bhaja.

12. Of course all his buying and selling and probably even personal hygiene is postponed until “Durga Pujo”, which necessitates to a truly unfortunate body odor.

13. The women are better than every one and all of them are quite unique.

14. Bong women are slow, stupid and in the guise of celibacy would still make “friend” with an unfortunate bloke and get her shopping needs completed.

15. Women bong love showing off their signs of marriage, even on face-book.

16. Even if they don’t have anything to do, they will be busy at home.

17. Bongs love to eat eggs but would never take it as a “tiffin”.

18. They have tiffins 3 times a day.

19. All of the bongs are just a step behind the intellectual ladder to be a nobel prize winner.

20. They love to see each other suffer, yes they are incredibly sinister towards their own “bhai” and “bondhus”.

***Just some personal experiences.

Thanks!

Posted from WordPress for BlackBerry.

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